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Despicable (2003-07-07 - ) Well ladies and gentlemen, as of Friday, I have reached a new plateau of binge drinking, and am quite proud of my body�s willingness to consume massive amounts of alcohol. A high school friend of mine came down Friday evening due to his mother kicking him out for the weekend. The deal was he could crash at my place as long as he supplied the beverages, which was great for me since I usually spend a lot of cash on beer. I�m one of those lucky/cursed people who have a pretty high tolerance for alcohol. The great thing about it is that you can be chilling out, sipping on you 9th or 10th beer while your friends are making total fools of themselves because they start loosing it around number 5. The bad side to this happy little story is that you usually end up dropping a C note on booze. Anyways, back to the story�Dick showed up around 8:30 with a 24 and a 20oz of rum. We managed to polish off both of them before 11:00, so we decided to go out to the local watering hole to see a few friends. Once there we kept on drinking�for free! It had been such a long time since either of us had been back to the bar that all of our friends were excited enough to see us that they all paid our way. This is trouble�never give free alcohol to someone who is already well on their way to sloshed land, because no matter how much you offer, they will always take it�and that�s what we did. 3:00am finally rolled around and we were all kicked out. We weren�t in the mood to stop the party so we made or way across the street down to the docks. (This bar is right across the street from a huge lake) All 6 of us noisily made our way down to the water to find some people sitting in a speedboat smoking a joint. �Come on in, have a beer, smoke a splif, etc�� Since I don�t smoke anymore I just laid down on the dock and checked out the stars with my buddy Poopie, whose belly makes a great pillow. It turns out that the so-called �splif� wasn't really weed, but coke, and Dick ended up so pumped, it was hilarious. It took us 2 hours to walk back to my place, which usually only takes about 20 minutes. Every restaurant or bar with a terrace was a prime candidate for our drunken lounging. We�d jump fences and chill on people�s patio furniture. By the time we made it home the sun was already in the sky and the birds we giving us shit. My father was up, getting ready to take our dogs for a walk. He just looked at us both, shook his head, and muttered� �Disgusting� under this breath�and that�s how I felt when Dick woke me up at 10:00. Word to the wise; if you�re going to get smashed and go to bed at 5:00am, just be sure to sleep past noon, before that, you really don�t wanna know what happens. |