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Blah (2003-07-01 - 12:44 p.m.) Why do people feel obligated to compare themselves to you when you�re in times of trouble? The FL break up was on Friday and since then every person I�ve told about it (Misstress excluded) just couldn�t resist telling me all about their experiences, as if trying to belittle my own situation by saying in not so many words��Oh, you think that�s bad, listen to what happened when I broke up with so and so.� Can�t people just be there to listen, hear and give sound advice? Isn�t that what friends are for? If I want to talk to a friend about something that is bothering me, I don�t want to come away from the conversation with more problems on my mind. Why do people do this? Why do they dump more garbage on your back when you go to them for help? When I�m in need I don�t go to my friends to have my situation demeaned with contrasting anecdotes. I don�t go to them so that they can compare their lives and problems to my own; I come for love and support. I do not to give them a call at 2:00am to try and talk about something that is really bothering me just to change the topic of conversation to one which revolves around them. If you don�t have any words of wisdom to give, then don�t say anything at all! Just give a supportive hug, or say that you�ll be there through this bad time. You don�t always have to be Freud for your friends�just being there should be enough. |