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JackAss (2003-06-16 - 12:37 p.m.) Now that the haze of alcohol has lifted from my mind, the thought of me being a complete idiot keeps bombarding me. As per Misstress, Saturday was fucked up, and the majority of that fuck up was caused, in part, by me (the rest was all FL�s fault). We were all having a smashingly good time drinking and reminiscing; you know those things friends do when they get together. Everything was going fine until I gave FL a call to see what he was up to, BAD IDEA! I should have said screw it and enjoyed myself with my friends, because that phone call turned my evening upside down. I won�t get into what was said, but I just had to leave. I couldn�t stay at Misstress� for an other minute. I hate crying, and I hate crying in front of other people even more. I walked as quickly as possible to my car, got in and floored it, despite the fact that SIR was running towards me trying to stop me. At that moment I wasn�t really thinking about anything or anyone�the only thought was GET OUT. I drove for a long time, off the island, past my house and I just kept going. (Ignoring almost every call and page that I was getting on my cell.) I didn�t know when or where I was going to stop, I only felt that I should keep on driving. Finally, after the shock of the conversation with FL wore off as well as my buzz, I turned around and headed for home. Needless to say, I felt like a complete jackass when I woke up Sunday morning. You know that first 45 seconds when you wake up after drinking, those times when you just feel like shit, you�re not really sure why, but you know you�ve done something really stupid the night before? Well, that�s what I was feeling all day. I feel that I might have come really close to jeopardizing some of my friendships, a little to close, and for what? Nothing�well, that�s not true, I�ve got the whole jackass thing going on for me. |